UNCERTAINTIES

Hello....

I haven't been having much to do at work since this morning. May be it's a good time to blog again, or never for the next few months.

Sometimes I feel so lost in my own busyness in life, too busy, sometimes it makes me numb! I don't seem to care for other people except for myself and my tight schedules. What-do-I-need-to-do-next kinda thing. When I get home after a long tiring day, I just lock myself up alone in my room, resting and reflecting. Not much of socialising. Even I don't feel like talking to my brother. Not good...

Although, lately I try to 'go out there' abit more, try to enjoy my busyness without being so wrapped up by it, physically and emotionally.

Alot of people are trying to achieve success in life, they don't care for people around them. Which as christians, we should care for other people, reach out.

Alright, now another thing...apart from many other things :)

I'm still waiting for my PR to come out, not sure when. Hmmm, I was having lunch with Irma the other Sunday, and she asked me, "...what will you miss the most here in Sydney, if you have to end up going home (Indo)?"

I thought for a while and said: "...it would be 'my close friends'...". For me, I learnt heaps about relationships when I was here. Before, friends to me were just 'friends', people outside me - not related in whatsoever ways. Now, I am able to view friends as people who are part of me. I came to understand how I needed them so much to go on. Especially when I had no one, no immediate family or relatives around here in Sydney. Friends are my family.

Now if I think back to that question, WHAT IF I have to go home, WHAT IF my PR isn't gonna be successful.., I think I'll take all my friends home with me hehe, only if that's possible!

Actually, I'm just anticipating the worst scenario. Out of so many uncertainties, only one thing that is certain - God holds tomorrow!

When I came here in Australia, I thought I was gonna live here forever, because studying at that time seemed to be a long way to go. Now I've finished what I came to do, just realised, this is not my permanent home, Indo is. Though would love to stay here, if my PR turns out fine. Fingers X'ed (= cross-ed not christ-ed; not like x'mas = christ-mas?).

Now I'm living in uncertainties, but I'm certain, He'll put me exactly where He wants me to be.